I'm having an out of body experience today. It's a little baffling to me that it took me all of two weeks to realize that he's just not that into me. After a certain number (that won't be revealed of course) of failed attempted relationships you'd think I would've grasped the concept of sifting through the signs. It's something I pride myself on. I don't, like most women I guess, consider myself to be your typical female. I know how to read the non verbal signs that boys and men like to through at us females to keep us on their "team" or the "I'm done with this" signs. But for whatever reason, like all of the previous attempts, I get into my "you just CAN'T be giving me the blow off signs" way and ignore all the signs until I question the guy to death and I no longer want to remain friends because you (meaning I of course) mislead me. LOL. It only took me two weeks to realize I was being blown off. I know right... He doesn't know what he is missing. LOL. So to all of my fellow strong and independent women play the game smart and don't become a statistic. Men are simple in a way that they will show and tell you exactly what you need to know. Read ALL of the signs and don't be misled. We have ALL of the power we just choose to lead with emotions instead of our heads. Also, I use the phrase "Play the Game" very loosely because when it comes to humans in general, we have a tendency to manipulate and try to have the upper hand in anything to remain in control. So play the game and play it right. Learn your guy/female of interest before engaging in any type of physical behavior. I guarantee you will be satisfied with the out come. And the moment you notice distance, fall back. Don't mention your falling back, just fall back and watch it work.
Signed
HE JUST CAN'T BE BLOWING ME OFF
Ladies lets be honest for a moment. Women are for the most part driven by emotion not perception. When the emotion that is driving you is desire (not particularly desire of one single item or in this case one man but insetad the desire for companionship) you tend to develop tunnel vission and a sense of delusion of grandeur. You completly dismiss the hints and the actions of a man whom is clearly screaming to you that "I dont want to be locked down by you or anyone right now but lets just have some fun my way!" and instead you default to "There must just be something wrong with him because how could someone not want this." My advice to you ladies is simple. Ask, then listen and finally look. Asko the man the truth from the start so you are both on one page, the same page. Then listen to his answer, and I mean really listen. Dont hear what you want to hear but LISTEN to his words. Finally look. Take a long hard honest look at his actions and if the dont match up with the first two steps then you take a big step in the opposite dirrection as fast as you can so you dont trap yourself. I say that because laddies after you ask, listen and look and you stil get caught its no longer on the man. It will be no ones fault but your own.
ReplyDelete- Same book, new chapter.
Great advice Sir. However, these are things that I know. I know to ask questions that I really want to know the answer to and not to ask the questions I would rather not know the answer to. Im an exceptional listener, its just that the truth gets a little lost in translation when emotions get invovled. I try to hold on to the truth that I know that I know that I know but it can be a little challenging when you've got your feelings wrapped up in someone who unworthy of my attention. I am a great listener when I'm told the truth. However, when I get the feeling I'm being lied to and I feel like I'm caught in a code deciphiering game then things become complicated and I become unsure as to how to proceed. But I'm a work in progress and I'll find my man who will be honest and completely into me. I can't wait!
ReplyDeleteI understand where you might be coming from but a couple of things. First if there is a question in your mind you want to ask but dont want to know the answer to then you are already starting off in the wrong direction. If you are trying to engage in a relationship that means something to you, then there should be no question that you are afraid of hearing the truth to. Otherwise your foundation has just found its first crack. And over time an unatended crack only gets bigger never smaller. Second, the moment you believe that you are wasting time on someone whom you deem "Unworthy" of your attention, then there should be a big sign flashing in bright florescent letters in your mind telling you "STOP NOW. THIS ROAD LEADS TO CONFUSION AND PAIN." (Among other chocie words) If you actually read this sign (and this part should be easy since you are an exceptional listener)and LISTEN to it you wont even give your feelings a chance to be invested. Any can listen when the truth is being told. My challange to you is to become and even better listener when you know that truth is no where to be found. Listen to his words and more importantly listen to yourself. Once you are are sure you are being lied to and playing the decihiering game, then the choice really isnt all that hard, walk away. Just think of it this way - 7 billion plus people on Gods earth, approx 60% are men. When you find one bad one believe cut him loose you have plenty more to sift through. We are all works in progress, but the very point of progression is to move forward never backward. If you see a big fault just let go dont hold on.
ReplyDelete-Same book, new chapter.